So in the midst of leaving work last night at 2am, after being told by very how shall I say intellectually challenged student to \u201cGet the hell of my phone\u201d, as he began to whimper at the fact he likely failed a class due to his own arrogance and pig headedness, a coworker and I began ad-libbing a little country dirty for him. After some serious laughing at the whole situation I decided I would write a song about it. This seems to be a growing tradition, as almost every job I\u2019ve had, others or I have composed a song in representation of the more humorous calls, and types of people we\u2019ve talked to or heard of.<\/p>\n
So in keeping of so said tradition I present to you\u2026<\/p>\n
Issues With Online Places<\/span><\/p>\n Sung to the melody of Friends In Low Places By Garth Brooks<\/span><\/p>\n Blame it all my roots<\/p>\n I showed up in school<\/p>\n And annoyed everyone who cared<\/p>\n The last one to know<\/p>\n The last one to show<\/p>\n I was the last one<\/p>\n And I didn\u2019t care<\/p>\n And I saw the surprise<\/p>\n Turn to anger in their eyes<\/p>\n When I started to whine and complain<\/p>\n Then I flooded you<\/p>\n Said, wait I\u2019m not through<\/p>\n So now you get to hear me complain<\/p>\n \u00a0Cause I got issues, with online places<\/p>\n ——————————————–<\/p>\n Where packets flow<\/p>\n And slow pings chase my sites away<\/p>\n And I wait all day<\/p>\n I\u2019m not big on correct answers<\/p>\n Think I\u2019ll slip on in to a new chat room on AOL<\/p>\n Cause I got issues, with online places<\/p>\n ——————————————–<\/p>\n Well I guess I wrong<\/p>\n I just don\u2019t belong<\/p>\n But then, I\u2019ve been kicked out before<\/p>\n It\u2019s the middle of the night<\/p>\n My dogs said goodnight<\/p>\n Its okay I\u2019ll sleep on floor<\/p>\n Hey didn\u2019t mean to yell at screen<\/p>\n Just give me and hour and then<\/p>\n I\u2019ll break down and cry<\/p>\n And now you\u2019re wondering why<\/p>\n As I call tech support again<\/p>\n ——————————————–<\/p>\n Cause I got issues, with online places<\/p>\n Where packets flow<\/p>\n And slow pings chase my sites away<\/p>\n And I wait all day<\/p>\n I\u2019m not big on correct answers<\/p>\n Think I\u2019ll slip on in to new a chat room on AOL<\/p>\n Cause I got issues, with online places<\/p>\n ——————————————–<\/p>\n Well I guess I wrong<\/p>\n I just don\u2019t belong<\/p>\n But then, I\u2019ve been kicked out before<\/p>\n It\u2019s the middle of the night<\/p>\n My dogs said goodnight<\/p>\n Its okay I\u2019ll sleep on floor<\/p>\n Hey didn\u2019t mean to yell at screen<\/p>\n Just wait till I screw up this class<\/p>\n They\u2019ll trace route my posting<\/p>\n Cancel all of my hosting,<\/p>\n And eventually track me down just to kick my ass<\/p>\n ——————————————–<\/p>\n Cause I got issues, with online places<\/p>\n Where packets flow<\/p>\n And slow pings chase my sites away<\/p>\n And I wait all day<\/p>\n I\u2019m not big on correct answers<\/p>\n Think I\u2019ll slip on in to a new chat room on AOL<\/p>\n Cause I got issues, with online places<\/p>\n ——————————————–<\/p>\n<\/div>\n Feel free to copy and forward those more deserving labors of technology, to add a hint of light to a typically otherwise grim day.<\/p>\n<\/pre>\n
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