Tuesday August 27, 2002 at 06:47 pm

Tuesday August 27, 2002 at 06:47 pm

So in the midst of leaving work last night at 2am, after being told by very how shall I say intellectually challenged student to “Get the hell of my phone”, as he began to whimper at the fact he likely failed a class due to his own arrogance and pig headedness, a coworker and I began ad-libbing a little country dirty for him. After some serious laughing at the whole situation I decided I would write a song about it. This seems to be a growing tradition, as almost every job I’ve had, others or I have composed a song in representation of the more humorous calls, and types of people we’ve talked to or heard of.

So in keeping of so said tradition I present to you…

Issues With Online Places

Sung to the melody of Friends In Low Places By Garth Brooks


Blame it all my roots

I showed up in school

And annoyed everyone who cared

The last one to know

The last one to show

I was the last one

And I didn’t care

And I saw the surprise

Turn to anger in their eyes

When I started to whine and complain

Then I flooded you

Said, wait I’m not through

So now you get to hear me complain

 Cause I got issues, with online places

——————————————–

Where packets flow

And slow pings chase my sites away

And I wait all day

I’m not big on correct answers

Think I’ll slip on in to a new chat room on AOL

Cause I got issues, with online places

——————————————–

Well I guess I wrong

I just don’t belong

But then, I’ve been kicked out before

It’s the middle of the night

My dogs said goodnight

Its okay I’ll sleep on floor

Hey didn’t mean to yell at screen

Just give me and hour and then

I’ll break down and cry

And now you’re wondering why

As I call tech support again

——————————————–

Cause I got issues, with online places

Where packets flow

And slow pings chase my sites away

And I wait all day

I’m not big on correct answers

Think I’ll slip on in to new a chat room on AOL

Cause I got issues, with online places

——————————————–

Well I guess I wrong

I just don’t belong

But then, I’ve been kicked out before

It’s the middle of the night

My dogs said goodnight

Its okay I’ll sleep on floor

Hey didn’t mean to yell at screen

Just wait till I screw up this class

They’ll trace route my posting

Cancel all of my hosting,

And eventually track me down just to kick my ass

——————————————–

Cause I got issues, with online places

Where packets flow

And slow pings chase my sites away

And I wait all day

I’m not big on correct answers

Think I’ll slip on in to a new chat room on AOL

Cause I got issues, with online places

——————————————–

Feel free to copy and forward those more deserving labors of technology, to add a hint of light to a typically otherwise grim day.

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